Dear virtual BFFs,
I think it’s about time I gave you an update on my life. I realize that for the past, well, year or so I haven’t been writing as much about myself, or my everyday endeavors and/or “feelings” as explicitly as I used to, and I think it’s time for a change.
When I started this blog four years ago, I had no secrets. Admittedly, my over-sharing cost me a couple friendships, as it took me a while to work out that not everyone wants the details of private life blogged about on the interweb. But now I feel like I’ve gone to the other extreme and hardly talk about myself or the people close to me at all, and when I do it’s in the form of really vague, “deep” short-story vibe posts that are cool too but are different from the confessional diary-style posts of yesteryear.
Why am I thinking about this now? Well, I was reading Tavi’s blog this morning, and my eyes were welling up with tears of joy as usual, and I started thinking: why do I love this blog so much? Sure, I like seeing pictures of her in cool outfits and reading all of her real-talk fashion musings, but that’s not really why I keep going back to Style Rookie. The real reason Tavi’s blog is so addictive/powerful is because she shares everything with us, even if it’s embarrassing or uncool, and in the end we really feel like we know her and how her teenage brain works. We see pieces of ourselves reflected in her idiosyncrasies and insecurities, and it makes us feel more comfortable in our own bodies and minds to know that we are not alone. Really, I don’t know where I’d be without her.
So, the new goal is to find a happy medium where I can talk about my issues/desires/problems honestly (without offending anyone), and also interview deaf people who fuck aliens or whatever it is I’m into these days. Deal? OK.
I wish I was Anna Karina circa 1961
So… news! I work part time at a Chinese food restaurant, which is invigorating. Basically writing pays really badly, and I was sick of not being able to afford cheese and having to steal my underwear from H&M, so I needed to get another job. At first I was kind of embarrassed to write about it, but then I was like, ‘Wait, when did I become so vein that I can’t admit to spending most of my Saturday nights serving drunk people fried rice?’ Man… I should have been a DJ.
Also, I have a boyfriend. His name is Hamilton and I used to internet stalk him kind of, and then one time I awkwardly hung out in front of his apartment in a wedding dress, and then somehow I convinced him to date me. He must be stupid. I was always afraid to write his name on here for some reason; I guess I felt like it would jinx it. But as someone who is constantly writing about boys and dating and being obsessed with people, it seems silly to be weirdly secretive about that.
Also, I’ve been really sick with a kidney infection these past couple weeks. Ugh, so gross! I had to cancel appointments with a couple of my domme clients, because obvs they can’t drink my infected urine. #LifeIsHard
And lastly, I live in New York now, and have for over a year. Not sure that’s clear, since a lot of my email friends seem to be confused and want to organize London hangouts. But like hello, I’ve moved on. (P.S. Actually what really happened was that I got deported because I was living there without a visa. See, sharing!)
Thank you and goodnight.