Are You Dating Your Doppelgänger?

Karley Sciortino slutever vogue

So, there’s a reason we all thought The Dreamers was the hottest movie ever, and it’s not just because of Louis Garrel. New research suggests that we find people whose faces mirror our own particularly fuckable. Gross! Read my latest Vogue column, about dating your double, HERE :) 

p.s. Vogue just enabled comments on their site for the first time… interested to see if there will be any debates/hate comments :)

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Tenga Sex Toy Giveaway

Tenga Toys Slutever

As some of you know, I’ve been hosting the new season of the VICE web series, People Who Just Had Sex. The show is sponsored by Tenga, the Japanese sex toy brand. I’m a big fan of Tenga because they make discrete vibrators that aren’t so fucking loud that they ruin the whole experience of sex (as many vibrators do). I also like the aesthetic of Tenga’s toys–for example, they did a line of mens toys that came in Keith Haring-print cases, and a separate line with art by Jiraiya, a famous homoerotic manga artist. Also, the vibrators for girls are really cute, pink, and feel like marshmallows.

Anywayz, the lovely people at Tenga were kind of enough to give me some sex toys to give away to you guys, my readers, as an early Christmas present–yay! The three toys above are what I have to give away. (Note the festive still-life I created in order to display them for you.) All you have to do to be eligible for the giveaway is to sign up for the Slutever newsletter by typing your name and email address where it says “newsletter” on the righthand sidebar of this page. I just recently created the newsletter, and I promise I won’t bombard you with crap, but rather will brighten your email with some sexy sunshine every other week or so.

Here’s what I’m giving away:

1. The large cylindrical toy is the Double Hole Cup. It’s for boys, and it’s basically a fake vagina/butthole that you can fuck from both ends, and each end feels different. It’s also good for gay couples because you can fuck it simultaneously. Watch an instructional video HERE.

2. The egg shaped one is the Egg Cloud. It’s for boys, and it’s basically a super stretchy egg-shaped masturbator that feels like dipping your penis into a cloud, apparently. It looks tiny, but you’d be surprised how much it stretches (I’ve seen it used). Watch an instructional video HERE.

3. The Iroha is a tiny vibrator that’s quiet, which makes it great for use during sex, and it’s also tiny, meaning it’s perfect for tossing in your purse if you’re the type of woman who likes to masturbate on the go. Watch an instructional video HERE.

On Wednesday Dec 5th I will choose the winners at random, and then email the winners for info on where to mail your lovely Christmas gift :)

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Save Yourself: 15 Slut-tastic Sex Facts

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1. Vajonfidence means “vagina confidence.” (I made that up.)

2. Bad: 83% of U.S. teenagers have sex for the first time before receiving any formal sex education.

3. Good: Almost a third of all women over 80 years old still have sex with their spouse or boyfriend.

4. Rub some jiz on your face immediately, because sperm has a tightening effect on the skin–aka it’s the world’s cheapest anti-aging cream.

5. Sperm has other uses beyond being an affordable beauty product. During World War I, British Secret Intelligence Service (MI6) used semen as invisible ink, because it didn’t react with iodine vapor (the main method used to detect invisible ink), and because there was clearly tons of it available. However, they stopped using it once they realized it smelt jank if it wasn’t, ya know, fresh.

6. They’re called STIs now, not STDs (that’s racist).

7. Important:  Researchers from the University of California found that men who helped with the housework got 50% more sex than those who did none.

8. Prostitution is legal in many countries (like about half of them), including Iran, where “temporary wives” can be obtained for a few hours. Convenient.

9. There are 5 calories in a teaspoon of semen. (FOR THE LOVE OF GOD SPIT IT OUT!) (J/K it’s gluten free so fuck it.)

10. We automatically perceive people who smell good as being more attractive.

11. Weird: Women used to menstruate during the new moon (when it’s dark at night) and ovulate during a full moon (when it’s light). Now, in a world full of artificial lighting and bright screens, women are not as in tune with the connection between their biology and nature, so our periods are all over the place. (Is this actually real tho? Whatever, it’s funny.)

12. Here’s a terrifying fact: Most Americans have an STI. More than two-thirds of Americans adults are infected with one or more strains of HPV (although thankfully only a small portion have the strains that can cause cancer).

13. 1 in 10 Americans with a smart phone have used it during sex. (Does that number seem low to anyone else??)

14. Your vagina is special and unique, just like a snowflake! Nerve endings are distributed differently in every woman’s vagina, which means that every woman needs a different combination of stuff going on in order to cum. (That’s why we need to help guys out–they can’t read a vagina’s mind.)

15. Cray: Gay men have bigger boners than straight men. (Not lying–you can read about it here.)

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A French Sugar Baby’s Guide to Hedonism in NYC

Screen Shot 2014-11-18 at 11.11.32 AMFor the latest installment of my Sugar Babies column for VICE, I spoke with a French sugar baby who recently arrived in New York, and who’s using a sugar daddy website to fulfill her hedonistic fantasies. Think caviar, ticking fetishists, penthouse threesomes, bruises and hidden cocktail parlors. Read it HERE :)

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15 Of My All Time Fave Porn Star Quotes

Stoya and James Deen by Steven Klein
 
As well as having genitals, porn stars also have brains. I’ve compiled 15 of my favorite things ever said by the porn stars I most admire. You’re welcome :)

1. “If you think pubic hair on a woman is unnatural or weird, you aren’t mature enough to be touching vaginas.” – Stoya

2. “I don’t define myself as straight, because if I meet a guy and I’m attracted to him, I’m going to have sex with him. I just have yet to meet the guy. I don’t like labels, I like freedom.” – James Deen (from his interview on the Brett Easton Ellis podcast–so good!)

3. “I think some people recognize my butthole before they recognize my face.” – Bobbi Starr

4. “People don’t understand that the main ingredient to everything is consent. I don’t believe that there is any fantasy too extreme or too out there to enact between two consenting adults in a safe environment. I actually think that it helps people grow and become comfortable with who they are. And that little step to admit what you like in the bedroom will bleed over to the rest of your life and allow you to be more open with yourself and with others about what you need and who you are.” – Princess Donna

5. “What one person sees as degrading and disgusting and bad for women might make some women feel empowered and beautiful and strong.” – Sasha Grey

6. “Something I find really amazing about porn is that the girls aren’t rail thin, they’re real women. Porn stars don’t starve themselves. Porn stars think, ‘Maybe if I eat this piece of cheesecake it will go straight to my ass, and then I’ll get hired for more butt movies.’ And actually, the girls who are super skinny don’t sell well, because people want to see bodies bounce. They want to see flesh–something to grab onto and suck on. Like, I don’t want to stick my face in somebody’s bony ass, because it will hurt my face, you know?” – Bobbi Starr (from my interview with her)

7. “I think every woman should get double penetrated at least once. It’s an intense experience, even if you just do it with a large toy and a person, or two toys and yourself. I just think every girl should try it.” – Joanna Angel

8. “When I went to the AVN [Adult Video News] awards, I’d just found out that I was pregnant. I was sitting there signing autographs, listening to my fans say, “Oh my God Tori! I love the way you sucked this dick,” or, “Oh my God, you take cock in the ass so great,” and all the while I was saying to myself, “These Spanx are really tight; I really just want to let my belly out.” – Tori Black (from my interview!

9. “I have found that when I know my own boundaries, when I have confidence in myself, other people do as well, and I’m also far better at blowing off any random a-hole that wants to pass judgment on me. Not in my life? Not one of my chosen people? I don’t care what you have to say about my choices.”- Dylan Ryan

10. “Why is there porn explicitly “for women”? By saying there needs to be porn for women, you’re basically isolating women as a gender, and saying, “This is how women should think. This is how their sexuality should be.” It’s counterproductive (from what I understand) to the equality movement. Who says that one woman’s take on sexuality is the right way to think? One woman might like to watch a film with high production value and beautiful sex. Another might like some BDSM things with beating, degradation — and it doesn’t mean either is right or wrong. Pornography is made for individuals to find what they enjoy, and what turns them on. There’s no market research on this because sexuality is always developing, growing, and evolving. You could talk to a million people about what they like in porn, and you’re going to get a million answers of what a million people like in porn at that moment.” – James Deen

11. “My goal is to be myself, and to challenge stereotypes, and to follow the rules, and break them, and make new rules. It’s not about doing something that’s already been done. That would be silly.” – Sasha Grey

12. “People always say, ‘You could be doing the most intense, extreme dirty thing and you make it look so pure.’ Whenever someone smacks my ass or hits my in the face, I’m smiling.” – Belladonna (from her cover interview in Richardson mag)

13. “I really enjoy the performance aspect of porn. Some of the best sex scenes to me can be poetry, and I think sexuality can be an art form. Sasha Grey always used to say that she was a performer, and I feel that way too.” – Kimberly Kane

14. “When I was 12 and 13 I had a lot of BDSM fantasies, and it was very difficult to deal with. I grew up Catholic, and I thought my fantasies and desires were wrong and immoral, and I didn’t have anybody to talk to about them, and the few friends I felt comfortable speaking to thought I was crazy. I wish I’d read 120 Days of Sodom when I was that age–I think it would have healed me as a person a lot.”  Sasha Grey (from my interview)

15. Our relationships to porn remain complicated and incredibly simple. Porn has proliferated and taken so many hits. It prevails and continues to be one of the many pop culture meters that is both affected by what people want and determines what people want. It is the ultimate representation of human sexuality and the biggest way in which we incorrectly interpret human sexuality. Porn is us.” – Dylan Ryan

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