Rants, Feelings & Opinions, Sex + Love Advice

Save Yourself: 15 Slut-tastic Sex Facts

November 24, 2014
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1. Vajonfidence means “vagina confidence.” (I made that up.)

2. Bad: 83% of U.S. teenagers have sex for the first time before receiving any formal sex education.

3. Good: Almost a third of all women over 80 years old still have sex with their spouse or boyfriend.

4. Rub some jiz on your face immediately, because sperm has a tightening effect on the skin–aka it’s the world’s cheapest anti-aging cream.

5. Sperm has other uses beyond being an affordable beauty product. During World War I, British Secret Intelligence Service (MI6) used semen as invisible ink, because it didn’t react with iodine vapor (the main method used to detect invisible ink), and because there was clearly tons of it available. However, they stopped using it once they realized it smelt jank if it wasn’t, ya know, fresh.

6. They’re called STIs now, not STDs (that’s racist).

7. Important:  Researchers from the University of California found that men who helped with the housework got 50% more sex than those who did none.

8. Prostitution is legal in many countries (like about half of them), including Iran, where “temporary wives” can be obtained for a few hours. Convenient.

9. There are 5 calories in a teaspoon of semen. (FOR THE LOVE OF GOD SPIT IT OUT!) (J/K it’s gluten free so fuck it.)

10. We automatically perceive people who smell good as being more attractive.

11. Weird: Women used to menstruate during the new moon (when it’s dark at night) and ovulate during a full moon (when it’s light). Now, in a world full of artificial lighting and bright screens, women are not as in tune with the connection between their biology and nature, so our periods are all over the place. (Is this actually real tho? Whatever, it’s funny.)

12. Here’s a terrifying fact: Most Americans have an STI. More than two-thirds of Americans adults are infected with one or more strains of HPV (although thankfully only a small portion have the strains that can cause cancer).

13. 1 in 10 Americans with a smart phone have used it during sex. (Does that number seem low to anyone else??)

14. Your vagina is special and unique, just like a snowflake! Nerve endings are distributed differently in every woman’s vagina, which means that every woman needs a different combination of stuff going on in order to cum. (That’s why we need to help guys out–they can’t read a vagina’s mind.)

15. Cray: Gay men have bigger boners than straight men. (Not lying–you can read about it here.)

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1 Comment

  • Reply Eastfist November 27, 2014 at 3:01 am

    Can I take it you swallow? That’s hot.

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