Vibrator

This a photo of me looking really serious with my new vibrator. My first one ever! For some reason vibrators never really appealed to me, probably because I can make myself cum pretty easily with my own hand. I have friends who swear by them and told me I was an idiot for not owning one, but I always felt like they were a waste of money when your fingers are free and can do (almost) the same thing. Right?

Then the other day I was interviewing a sex therapist (interview to come soon!), and when I told her about my vibratorless life she literally cracked up laughing and shouted, “What?! Slutever doesn’t own a vibrator? That’s crazy!” She made me feel like I was missing out, stressing that vibrators aren’t only for when you’re being a horny maniac alone at your apartment, but that they’re also really useful during sex too. I suddenly felt like as a “sex writer” I should probably own one, even just for “research purposes” or whatever, so following the interview I immediately went online and ordered one from Babeland.

It came in the mail this morning. It’s not one of those crazy high tech ones that fucks you on the inside while a baby tiger claws rubs back and forth across your clit; it’s just a little silver ball that vibrates, called a Silver Bullet. I just used it for the first time like ten minutes ago. Uh… I like it? I definitely came in about two minutes, so I guess a positive is that the vibrator will make my masturbation sessions more efficient. And I suppose, unless you want to waste your life away jerking off, efficiency in masturbation is important. I also had a particularly long orgasm. I need to try it out more to see if the extended orgasm was due to the vibrator or if that was just chance. Also, another plus is that it’s really small and discrete, i.e. it would be really easy to carry around in your handbag, just in case you ever want to have a quickie in a restaurant bathroom or something. However I think I need to use it during sex before I decide is this weird vibrating egg thing is actually an upgrade from my hand.

Thoughts? Opinions? Am I the only one who thinks vibrators are kind of overrated?

P.S. I think someone might be a bit threatened by my new purchase??

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40 Responses to Vibrator

  1. Avery says:

    I also waited I really long time to get a vibrator, for the same reasons. I also found girls I knew who had their first orgasm with one/used one all the time seemed to have more trouble getting off during partner sex. Vibrators are tots awesome for when you wanna get off fast, but make sure you alternate between your hand/vibrator or else you’ll find your clit gets desensitized. Also, for the record, This one is pretty awesome as well.

  2. W. says:

    Im not interested in vibrators at all .. I mean yeah, my hands works well.. and anyway I tried it time ago,my boyfriend at the time was kind of kinky and bought me an awful penis-looking one.. I used like two times.. and it was ok, but not really interesting to me.. but that was like 10 years ago.. .. I guess found it kind of lame this kind of fashion about “every girl must have one” ¿Every girl without hands ?.Kind of some stupid way to make people into buy useless things..

    By the way looks like and mp3 player..

  3. Ita says:

    Hey Karley! Always nice to read you!!
    This time I disagree with Hamilton’s answer. I don’t consider myself being feminist just for the sake of having “sex-toys”. Nothing but “comfort” changed. I mean, my hand doesn’t get “exhausted”.. Without a doubt, he is being theatened by you vibrator! HIS answer is sexist!
    Btw, I still choose men’s penis, body, smell, fluids, kisses..
    Even more, I still depilate my entire body, prepare myself putting on my sexsyest underwear and “splash” myself with some aphrodisiac perfume.. What I mean is that, if I had become feminist I would have behaved like men do: not taking care of myself, just thinkin: “Why the hell do I have to be thin, depilated, all maked-up if you don’t even think about it before dating me?”
    Dispite this, I’m pretty sure you’ll enjoy it and have a good time every time! Give yourself time to explore it, and share it with Hamilton!
    I wait for you next interview anxiously

    love, xxx

    • W. says:

      “What I mean is that, if I had become feminist I would have behaved like men do: not taking care of myself, just thinkin: “Why the hell do I have to be thin, depilated, all maked-up if you don’t even think about it before dating me?”

      Educate yourself please, you obviously dont know the meaning of the word feminism…. By the way I had no idea men didnt take care of themselves…

    • famnil says:

      why is being a feminist such a bad thing? i think, every woman who shows some respect for herself is a feminist – no matter if she shaves her armpits or not.

    • Christie says:

      also- humour

      • hi says:

        I’m with Christie. Hamilton’s feminist comment is obviously a joke. Do people not get jokes? Life tip: not everything everyone says is meant to be taken 100% literally.

        sarcasm |ˈsärˌkazəm|
        noun
        the use of irony to mock or convey contempt : his voice, hardened by sarcasm, could not hide his resentment. See note at wit .
        ORIGIN mid 16th cent.: from French sarcasme, or via late Latin from late Greek sarkasmos, from Greek sarkazein ‘tear flesh,’ in late Greek ‘gnash the teeth, speak bitterly’ (from sarx, sark- ‘flesh’ ).

  4. dirty says:

    i like my imagination and my hand better. seriously i like orgasms even without my hand. if im that amped up in my brain, i dont even have to touch myself like, much at all. people using machines to achieve orgasm is unnecessary and unimaginative and creepy and i could go on

    • dirty says:

      yea like, just because we can, doesn’t mean we should. like, horses and dogs dont need magic bullets or whatever they just need a bitch

      whatever slutever i just woke up. and is it tuesday or friday and am i supposed to keep on dreaming or wake up?

  5. DORA says:

    all i need to do is hump my pillow with a mix of my hand for like 30 seconds and im off. #AFFORDABLE EFFICIENCY.

    • DORA says:

      TBH masturbating has made me think that like basically THE WORLD IS YOUR DILDO. Every object has the potential to be your next orgasm. The edge of the bed, the deodorant, the nail polish bottle, the lipstick, the arms of a doll you loved as a kid, the chair, the beanbag, the showerhead, the shampoo… basically humping or rubbing or sticking in whatever with the right texture at the right mood and time.

      • karleyslutever says:

        I actually never hump stuff. Maybe I’ll try. Do you wear underwear while you do that though? I feel like it’s not a good idea to just rub random stuff from my dirty house on my vagina.

        • DORA says:

          Actually I find that like wearing underwear while masturbating makes me cum faster, its because of the friction, and yes like I hardly ever masturbate lying faceup, humping stuff guarantees a faster orgasm. Try this recipe next time you’re masturbating: while you’re still dressed pull a pillow under your vaginal area, start moving around (this is masturbation foreplay) and imagine whatever it is that turns you on or have some porn playing on like a phone next to you (whatever the turn-on preference). Then start touching yourself while moving around on the pillow, this is the time for you to take your pants off, do it with your ass in the air, touch yourself again, now hump the pillow some more, if you feel like you need more clitoral stimuli then just a pillow grab something with a penile texture (dildo, deo whatever). Now because your vagina hasn’t touched anything bare yet the first touch while already being half way is super amazing, you’ll feel super slimy, start humping away with one hand controlling the stimuli (make sure the stimuli is long enough to touch the clit as well as the tip of the opening of the vagina) I am reminding you that you are still on a pillow (which grants some height) and still wearing your underwear (which holds the “penis” in place for when you are touching yourself or holding onto your bedsheets or whatever). I guarantee an orgasm, but dont give up after the first one, take out the “penis” and move around the pillow until you’re horny enough for round number 2. Anyways I’ve been using this recipe for years now, works best for me and the girlfriends I’ve recommended it to. Ive reached a record of 4 orgasms a row with this (something which I could never achieve with sex with such short intervals.) Anyways girl, hope you have time to try this, email me with your verdict on my recipe. x

          • dirty says:

            ive had 16 orgasms in a row on the most hungover morning of my life after a threesome with two idiots that didnt get me off. not kidding about the number 16 i counted and i remember the number. orgasms help with detox. look it up

      • jules says:

        “the world is your dildo”

        love it.

  6. stalker #999 says:

    I waited for my girlfriends to get me one for my bday, (eventually they all do…) cuz i felt lame buying one…. it wasn’t as interesting as i thought… like the first time you fuck… so it was forgotten for a couple of years.. recently I rediscovered it with my BF… OMG….. he is really into eating pussy.. and a great lover.. but sometimes, you just want to be horny faster… you don’t even have to think of anything kinky…. and when you are about to explode, you start fucking….. the best orgasms i’ve ever had… and i’m a clit woman… it’s a good way to start (really) enjoying intercourse….. or if your lazy… but i think it’s good not to over use it… as well as porn… don’t let yourself become too lazy… you’ll turn into a numb bitch

  7. ER says:

    I have a hard time believing your readers would all chip in negatively on vibrators. It was all: “Wait, on what website am I?!” http://www.prudistanmcbiblebelt.com?
    Dismissing a woman using sex toys that vibrate as unimaginative and creepy? Ouch.
    For us it’s a great way to enhance and ignite change into our bedroom play. There’s so many ways a woman can get off, why not try to take advantage of that? And if it feels threatening to the male part, a talk about how your orgasm is yours alone, with or without the help of the SO, might be needed. Shouldn’t love and lust be there to get the other off as good as possible?
    That’s all.

    • courtney says:

      No one said they were “bad”. People are just giving their opinions based on their personal own personal experiences with vibrators. Good job finding something to get angry about though.

  8. carolyn says:

    I agree with ER and I definitely feel a judgey tone amongst you commenters. If it gives you an orgasm, it gets my seal of approval. If you don’t ‘need’ it congrats. Some girls do. Some girls don’t and prefer a vibrator. The important thing is that you’re making yourself cum, something a shocking number of women cannot or do not.

  9. taryntavi says:

    I’m going to sound totally silly so bear with me – but I hate touching my own vag it’s a complex I have and the only way I’ve gotten past it is by purchasing a vibrator. I lost a lot of sex drive playing with myself mainly because I didn’t want to be touching my own vag and knowing I was the one creating the sexual tension was…odd. I dunno, I sound very naive but it just didn’t work for me. Then I got a vibe and woahhh, life has never been better.

  10. Emma says:

    I think bullet ones are the best kind! Forget the dildo kind – all you need is for it to be pressed up against your clit, or around that area, and bam! best orgasm ever :D. Makes me feel less shit about being single for extended periods lol. I got one a few years ago and not only is it faster, but i find my orgasms are more intense. I think the idea that it desensitizes your clit is stupid – you don’t even need to press it directly against it anyway, and even if you do, there isn’t a limit to how many times you can cum. Like one of the other girls, I also find that rubbing against something (normally my own underwear) gets me off more than using my hand (maybe because this is how i first started masturbating when I was a lot younger), and then i just slip the vibrator in their too, and it’s great. Best 20pounds I ever spent! Haven’t tried it during sex yet – but i’ve always thought being tied up and then forced to orgasm with a vibrator is pretty hot. You should ask Hamilton to do that for you – could be another fun wake up call ;). And you have to ask him for permission first. And if you keep bringing yourself to the edge, and then stopping, you get the most intense orgasm…if you have the patience. X

  11. karleyslutever says:

    I’m liking the communication. Good masturbation ideas :)

  12. dalas v says:

    In Photo Booth, go to the Edit menu and click “Auto Flip New Photos”. Peeve.

  13. Marla says:

    The World is your dildo!

  14. Lala says:

    The best part is that clears your mind in obsessing about guys. Every time I have fallen in love really hard was because the sex was awesome. Somehow men are optional after bullet.

  15. Lala says:

    The bullet

  16. Darnthly says:

    “What?! Slutever doesn’t own a vibrator? That’s crazy!” basically it.

  17. julia says:

    I used to use a vibrator for hours at a time, until I was totally desensitized and it HURT. (I was depressed and addicted to masturbation, ok?!) I did that a whole lot. I’m still able, now, to come pretty easily using my hand, alone and during partner sex. I’ve made myself come 20 times (my previous record was 13….) just using my hand. Actually I can come more times just using my hand, because I don’t get desensitized like I do with a vibrator.

  18. Rhi says:

    I got the same type of thing, a golden bullet. I thought it was shit but felt kinda compelled to use it because its supposed to make masturbation so much better. I just kinda rest it on my clit and close my legs tight when im feeling simply too exhausted to move my hand loliez.

  19. What perverted foods are good for a sex toy party?

  20. niemascreama says:

    Sextoys saved my life, not literally, but close. After years of struggling with my sexuality due to molestion, sexual assault and other actions that fucked my mind. I needed sextoys, I was terrified of my vagina, breasts or anything sexual, it was torture to relax and enjoy sex with my very patient, loving husband. Although in the last 4 years, I have a new attitude about sex: fuck it, I’m enjoying myself (my husband is still patient, but happy I am getting sexually satisified). Vibrators are wonderful! Just don’t rely on them too much, as someone mentioned: you get lazy and who wants that bullshit? Viva la vibrators!

  21. jewels says:

    that’s like saying sex is overrated the first time you have it you have to get used to it and learn how to move with it, it’s not simply about giving you a fast orgasm it’s about giving you a totally different kind of orgasm

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