Ask Slutever (AKA Ask Sugar Tits)

Have no fear! The slutty, stripper sex blogger Sugar Tits is here to rescue you from your sexual woes. Sugar Tits is my #1 blog obsession of the moment (I still love you, Tavi) and her previous guests posts on Slutever have all been so epically perverted, that I enlisted her to answer some of the dirtiest questions from the Ask Slutever archive. Enjoy!

I recently started sleeping with the guy I’ve had a crush on for 6 months and I’m so happy! However he’s very different in bed to how he is in real life. Normally he’s very outgoing, but in bed he’s submissive. The thing is I prefer being submissive in bed and like being tied up and spanked and stuff (within reason), but with him I’m always the one taking charge. Do I resign myself to sex being like this with him, or is there a way I can get him to dominate me? Anonymous, TX

Gurl, I understand. I’m often faced with the same problem and it always sucks! Unfortunately, if he isn’t pulling your hair, spanking and choking you on his own accord, you’ll have to tell him to do so. (Which of course takes the fun out of it because giving instructions is more of the dominant person’s role). I hate to break it to you, but if he’s submissive, he’ll probably hate dominating as much as you do, and in my experience this stuff isn’t good when it’s forced. But you should at least tell him how you feel. Maybe yall can take turns abusing each other? If yall like each other enough there’s always a solution–hopefully not one involving you having to “resign” to sex you don’t like.

I’m 23 and just got out a 2 year relationship. Recently I have been–ahem–“exploring my options.” The thing is, I watch a lot of porn and I guess I imitate it during sex without even realizing. Then the other day I was having sex with this guy, and afterward he told me I was “really porno”, but he said it in a way that seemed negative, or like the way I was acting was somehow put-on. Do guys not like it when girls give porno, lolipop, eye-contact blowjobs? Should I scream less? Should I be more sweet and girlfriendy in bed? I’m confused.

OK, so the problem is that you’re amazing in bed? What guy doesn’t want hot, porno, eye-contact blowjobs? I think if what you’re doing comes naturally, you shouldn’t change it. Like, if you’re “In Love” with this guy you can compromise a bit because “relationships take work” and blah blah blah, but it sounds like this is a casual thing so literally just do what you feel like. Sex should be about having the ability to act however you want and not be judged for it. If someone is making you feel self-conscious about your screaming or peeing or whatever, then what’s the point? Anyway, if this guy doesn’t like the way you’re fucking I’m sure that TONS of other guys will.

I’m almost 27 years old and I’ve been in true love once in my life. This girl and I planned to be together for the rest of our lives and talked about it often. Then a few months ago she completely tore my heart out to go be with another guy. This nearly killed me. I’m getting better now, at least enough to be interested in seeing other girls. The thing is, I’ve never felt more dangerous/dark as when I lost her, and now I’m terrified of being in a relationship. I’m worried you’ll think I’m a delusional egomaniac when I say this, but the problem that I’m having is that I’m currently spending time with several girls, none of whom I’ve led to believe are the only girl I’m talking to, but most of whom have expressed that they feel they are falling in love with me. I don’t want to hurt anyone and I don’t want to be in love with anyone. Is it immoral of me to continue being sexually involved with someone when her feelings for me are quite strong and I’m completely opposed to the idea of returning those feelings? –T

Hey dude, first I’m going to tell you something I’m sure everyone has already but YOU WILL FEEL BETTER. “First Love” is especially hard. It took me a year get over my first boyfriend. I cried every day, wanted to die and thought I’d never be normal again. Then I started sleeping around, “found myself,” and fell in love with someone else last year who broke my heart too. So then I became depressed all over again (lolz)! Now I’m fine but I’m sure I’ll go through it like a billion times more. The point is, this is normal and it’s OK to be sad. And untill you recover, the best thing you CAN do is what you’re already doing! It definitely isn’t “immoral” to see several girls at once, even if you know you won’t return their feelings. Just the fact that you’re asking means you’re obviously not a “delusional egomaniac,” and considering that you’re being honest with all of them, nothing you’re doing is wrong! It’s their own problem they’re falling in love with you ;) Enjoy it and take care of yourself.

I feel like I’ll never find someone I want to sleep with for longer than two weeks. And in two weeks you can only have sex in so many ways. My question is: what is the best way to ask to pee on someone on the first date? Thanks, Joelle

Just Do It! I think you should start in the shower. Make him sit or lie down so you stand or sit on top of him and and just say “I have to pee” and unless he says “no” just go for it! Hopefully he’ll be into it but if he’s like “gross” just pass him the soap and continue to fuck him as if it didn’t happen. Honestly he’ll probably like it, I mean, I never thought I’d enjoy getting pissed on, but after the first time I totally loved it and even drank it and stuff! Anyway, the worst that can happen is him thinking you’re a freak but you’re only gonna know him for two weeks, right? So who cares ;)

I’ve been best friends with a guy for over two years and he finally told me he liked me. We ended up making out one day, him eating me out the next, and me giving him a BJ in the woods the day after that. The problem is I don’t just want to be fuck buddies, I want to be an actual relationship. Do you think it’s possible to be in a serious relationship with someone even if you jump into things so fast? I want this to last! Yours, Slutella

Though it’s true that there’s a difference between someone you actually want to be with and someone you just want to fuck, that doesn’t mean the two can’t mix! I’ve started several long-term relationships via fucking! Honestly, I think sex is one of the best ways to get to know someone. If you start dating a guy and wait too long to have sex only to find out that he’s really terrible in bed, then what do you do?? Also, you and this guy already love each other as friends (which is so important) and obviously have tons of sexual chemistry, so it sounds like the beginning of a great romance! If you’re worried he doesn’t get that, just tell him. I’m sure he already feels the same way.

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