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Most Americans celebrate our Independence Day by day-drinking covered in tacky American flag accessories that were probably made in China. This year, why not masturbate to some patriotic woodland sex? By Vera Papisova.
Do you like camping? Do you like the ~idea~ of camping? Do you like sex? Do you like America? Do you like American Apparel? Are you a human person?
If you answered yes to at least one of the above questions, please keep reading.
Our friends at MakeLoveNotPorn.tv have decided to make Independence Day a little sexier. Today they released a special July 4th video of #realworldsex featuring (obv) a real-world couple.
In case you’re in the dark about what Make Love Not Porn is:
MLNP.tv is a user-generated video sharing platform that publishes videos of real people having real sex. This is different to porn, which is videos of professionals having performative sex. See the difference?#RealWorldSex is a new category of erotic film, an alternative to porn, and it’s not “amateur” either—that would imply that the only people doing it right are the professionals. (Fun fact: MLNP.tv is the only place you can find porn stars having real sex with their real partners!)
Here’s how Make Love Not Porn describe their patriotic video:
“Are these two adorably All-American or what? Celebrating the 4th of July by barbecuing at their favorite lake. Colin and Gray are decked out in red, white and blue apparel… at least, for a little bit. Glistening and soaking wet from a dip in the lake, these two love birds take advantage of the fact that they’re the only ones around and engage in a quickie on a blanket in the woods.”
Here’s the video’s trailer. (And don’t worry, this is the tame, safe-for-work trailer):
A lot of good things are happening here: Wilderness sex has that whole Adam and Eve vibe going on, and that’s pretty hot. Plus, I can’t really think of a better way to celebrate the birth of this great nation than to give money to a company that produces what should essentially be called fair-trade adult content. (All the videos are $5 FYI, and part of the proceeds go to the people having sex in the videos, who make the vids themselves.) Trust me, we need to support as many of the good guys (and girls) as we can.
Want to watch some patriotic woodland sex? (I do!) Check it out on MLNP.tv.
Vera Papisova is a writer and sometimes standup comedian who writes for Teen Vogue, Yahoo Style and Complex. She also writes the Ask a Porn Star series for Slutever.