My MTV Crib

September 6, 2011

Me in my office

Somewhere amid the zillions of hate comments on my last post (yikes!) someone suggested I post some photos of my apartment, and I’ve decided to do just that! Also, Tavi has been blogging about her bedroom recently, and obvs I have to do everything Tavi does.

As some of you long time readers know, I’ve lived in many-a-shithole, both in London and NYC. My current apartment is the first place I’ve lived, since moving out of my parents’ house, that didn’t look like this. However I can’t take much credit for it. My roommate, Amanda, lived here for a year before me and is primarily responsible for the house looking the way it does. Minus my room.

Da living room, where we have cerebral conversations and mutually masturbate (simultaneously).

Our shrine to Artemis, virgin goddess of the hunt, wilderness, wild animals, childbirth and plague.

My friend Phoebe looking hot while eating tacos in our pop art kitchen. The chalkboard wall in the background is where we jot down our important business notes.

Fridge, complete with multiple of Brad’s piss drawings. Those colorful Polaroids are “aura photos”, purchasable from Magic Jewelry in Chinatown. What color is your aura? Find out today for just $15!

“Grizley Spears” collage, made by Amanda and her friend Selma. When I asked what the inspiration behind it was, Amanda replied, “We were drunk”.

This is a portrait of my friend Lauren as a child. You may recognize Lauren as the exercise instructor from our High Fashion Exercise video.

Middle Eastern Madonna purchased by Amanda for $20 from a homeless man on Bedford Avenue. Great for staring at while peeing.

Gotta have my bowl gotta have vitamins (and cranberry pills to promote urinary track health).

One of Hamilton’s important science experiments that I’m not allowed to touch.

My room! Was going to clean it up for the picture but then remembered I promised to “get real”, so decided to leave the underwear on the floor. American flag purchased from Duane Read for just $9.99 yall!

It’s very Tavi of me to be reading this book.

We are fans of “art”.

… and “music”.

Paper model of laughing Hasidic Jew. (No home is complete without one.)

Scientology stress test machine usurped by Amanda as a trophy after having lezbionic sex with a Scientologist. Handy at dinner parties.




You Might Also Like


  • Reply Isa September 6, 2011 at 10:30 pm

    glad to see Squinx written on the chalkboard.

  • Reply Isa September 6, 2011 at 10:33 pm

    what's with the american flagsand I miss you. when are you gonna come back?

  • Reply !! September 6, 2011 at 10:46 pm

    you're my favorite writer, fuck the h8ers

  • Reply dalas v September 6, 2011 at 10:53 pm

    Wow, those e-meters can be really expensive.

  • Reply anna September 6, 2011 at 11:39 pm

    karley, just pee before and after sex and you won't get urinary tract infections. also, wash your vag every day. that cranberry shit won't do nothin'

  • Reply SLUTEVER September 7, 2011 at 12:10 am

    I have been peeing after sex and taking showers ever day! I don't know what's going on, I hate my vagina. But the vaginaologist actually told me to take those cranberry pills and that they actually do work, so we'll see…

  • Reply Collorious September 7, 2011 at 12:27 am

    Nothing says HIGH POWERED 80S SEX like a Nagel on your wall!

  • Reply david September 7, 2011 at 12:47 am

    Karly you are unbelievably gorgeous!!! Will you cum to Baltimore and pee on me??

  • Reply SLUTEVER September 7, 2011 at 2:03 am

    If you pay for my trip I'll come.

  • Reply david September 7, 2011 at 2:12 am

    Well maybe I could come to NY to your dom joint? I was kinda kidding about the pee thing, never done it, but…I do have a foot fetish and your feet in that top pic have been killlling me!! I don't know if I could take meeting you in real life…tooo hot!

  • Reply anusbeverage September 7, 2011 at 2:56 am

    I wonder what mushroom Hamilton Morris was spore printing? I want him to make a spore print on my face.

  • Reply sarah September 7, 2011 at 3:43 am

    I suggested the apt. pics and I really like your new place. What a major difference from Squally! This a really nice and eclectic apartment.

  • Reply B September 7, 2011 at 5:03 am

    baywatch babes . are we best friends? whatever i dont care.

  • Reply mallory September 7, 2011 at 2:28 pm

    read your emails!

  • Reply stephen September 7, 2011 at 3:29 pm

    your a trip! and i do mean that in a good way!!!

  • Reply Setsy September 7, 2011 at 9:12 pm

    Are those psychedelic mushrooms then?

  • Reply lala September 8, 2011 at 2:40 am

    Maybe your vadge (pee hole) is not working due to ass and pussy ratio. If you get plugged in the ass the penis must be clean before any vadge play. Simple math.

  • Reply lala September 8, 2011 at 2:41 am

    Nice apartment

  • Reply dgsa September 8, 2011 at 3:11 pm

    longest of legs that extend to the heavens. sweet home

  • Reply Sam September 11, 2011 at 9:44 pm

    More pics of you in that red get up would be greeeaat.

  • Reply Sailor September 13, 2011 at 1:11 am

    I always thought you'd have a rad apartment. I love the "art", hilarious. I'm happy that you're living in a beautiful apartment now. Slagging it in the early years, always gets you to a better place.

  • Reply mia September 14, 2011 at 3:46 am

    Love the little photo of Fleetwood Mac! Hahaha I love you even more now that that is up there. Yeah, and the "art" wall/section is great. Have been dying to see where you live, such a cute place.

  • Reply Baby September 14, 2011 at 5:14 pm

    Nice crib. How do you afford to live in a place like than in NY though?

  • Reply SLUTEVER September 19, 2011 at 5:59 pm

    Well I live in Brooklyn, and technically I don't have an actual "room". It's more of an "area" sectioned off by pieces of fabric.

  • Leave a Reply