Video Memoriez

Yo! Here’s the newest video update of my life! I realized the other day that I’ve never filmed anything at the Chinese restaurant where I work. Working there is SO awkward because none of the chefs speak English and obvs none of the alt white girl waitress speak Chinese, so there is a lot of embarrassing/failed hand signal communication going on constantly. It’s like endless food charades. I also have a semi-stalker who’s like 50 who comes in and brings me weird presents like bagels with salmon and cream cheese. (#carbaside) So many memoriez, so little time…

Also, you should LIKE Slutever on Facebook, duh.

Video Memoriez:

Please, sit back, relax, take a hit on the ol’ gravity bong and watch as I tackle that age old question: What is the key to looking famous?

P.S. I shared, now it’s your turn. What was the best thing YOU did this week?

Lyfe Advice With Andy Von DudeBaby

My friend Andy Von DudeBaby knows a lot about life and getting real and being real and getting down with the kids and getting shit done, and thankfully for you he’s feeling generous like a Buddhist right now and wants to share some of his vast important lyfe knowledge with you all. Thank you.

I <3 Is Tropical

Some of my old squat buddies are in a band called Is Tropical. In honor of their awesomeness I made this extremely intellectually challenging video to explain why everyone should check out their recently released debut album, Native To. I lived with Is Tropical–AKA Simon, Gary and Dom–for a few years back when we were skanky London squatters eating out of the trash and having 2cb induced orgies. (Actually, I think they’re still doing that; thankfully I’ve moved on.) I’ve written about Simon’s escapades on this blog many times, for example the time he brought home a bag of human feces that he found on the street because he thought it was a bag of potatoes, then left it in the Squallyoaks living room for over a week. Or the other time when he gave a random old man head in the bathroom of a gay bar while in a K-hole for £45. Classy.

Below is the music video for their latest single, The Greeks, which I genuinely think is one the bestest most greatest music videos ever made.

Video Memoriez

So I know I’ve been kind of lame about posting regularly for the past couple weeks. Sorry! Things should go back to normal soon. I’ve been busying moving apartments. For the first time in my life I actually live somewhere that’s not totally gross/about to collapse/in the middle of an industrial wasteland. It feels so good to masturbate in a nice clean shower and to have guests over without having to say things like “careful not to fall in that hole.” I even own a plant! Well, my roommate does, but I’m allowed to touch it. Here’s a video of some of the stuff I’ve been up to lately. SMILE!

Video Memoriez 3

Why hello. Yet again I have compiled a selection of some of the things I’ve been looking at through my eyes as of late. I hope you enjoy it. I recently got back to NYC after a two week vacation in London. It was so amazing, I don’t think I realized how much I missed it, or how integral London and my friends there are to who I am (cheesy) until I went back and saw everyone again. FUCK! Whatever. Also, I hoped you liked my last post about Mistress Dee, because I have many more stories about her that will be told very soon. We’ve been spending much quality time beating up and peeing on strange men recently. Life is lolz?

P.S. Like Slutever on Facebook! Duh!

Video Memoriez 2

The last time I posted a video montage people seemed to like it, so I’m going to make it a regular thing. Here’s a video of some of the stuff I’ve been up to over the past couple weeks. I’m actually in London at the moment visiting friends. It’s been 10 months since I moved from London to NYC, and during that time I seem to have mentally blacked out a few quintessential things about this city. For one it’s way more gross looking here than I remember. Like it’s just pretty aesthetically unappealing in general, and everyone looks malnourished, but not in the good way. Also the level of ketamine people here consume on a daily basis is astonishing. Oh and no one here showers and people generally smell a bit stale/manky. Not criticizing, just making an observation! I love it here! Been spending lots of time with Bunny too. This morning he woke up and said “Last night I dreamt I had sex with a lobster. But like, a man sized one.” His sexuality never fails to confuse/disgust me.

P.S. The girl on the left talking about faking orgasms is Tea from the t-crumpets blog. Her blog is really funny/sexy/gross, you should check it out!

Video Memoriez

Yesterday I was going through an old hard drive and found a bunch of videos from a Flipcam I briefly owned about two years ago. Unfortunately the Flipcam was eaten by my ex-squatmate Hannah’s vagina, along with many of my other possessions, however in the two weeks that I owned it I managed to get some very groundbreaking and universally important footage. I’ve made a little video montage out of it for your viewing pleasure. The time I owned the cam overlapped with the time my friends and I were evicted from our infamous (lol) squat Squallyoaks, so most of these vids are of Squally’s final days/moving out/doing whatever. Enjoy!