The Return Of Squallyoaks

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Finally, after four months of living in a cold, dark sex dungeon, we have successfully found a new and amazing squat to bring back the true spirit of Squallyoaks! Hurray! I’m insanely happy, as the last house was really starting to depress me. Not only was it WAY too small, but it was a basement flat, which meant there was barely any natural light and the whole place felt like a dank, overcrowded cave. Not to mention the ultra thin walls. I fell asleep to the muffled sounds of people fucking almost every night. (It also might be worth mentioning that everyone shared beds and I never saw a sheet get changed once.) The last time I was there, while getting dressed I put my foot into my boot to find that someone had thrown a used condom in there. Now you know why we called it the Sex Dungeon. For the record I only had sex in there once, and I barely remember it which means it doesn’t count.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

But moving on to bigger and better things, the new house is incredible. I’m not sure what it used to function as exactly—it looks like it could have been a gallery of some sort. It’s two floors in total, plus a roof garden. We don’t have that much stuff in there yet, but we’ve had the ingenious idea of using tents as bedrooms, as the place is essentially two giant, open spaces, rather than separate rooms. It’s like camping without the hassle of being outside.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Sadly, quite a few of Squallyoaks’ previous occupants have now moved on from their squatting days, choosing instead to to live in real-people houses and do real-people things like bathe and own forks. Slutevs! At the moment the Squally team has dwindles to just four—me, Bunny, Simon and Darren (plus the addiction of three Italian guys and one Hungarian girl who don’t really speak English and I plan on just pretending don’t exist). Still, I’m excited for my new life. 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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